Session

As of writing, my CS block’s three-day (pre-graduation) retreat is scheduled tomorrow in some resort somewhere in Batangas. I’m not that excited, but still looking forward to it. It’s been a while since I had a decent out-of-town trip.

The huge tarpaulin print, with the group pix of us ’06 graduating class officers, was posted in front of the college arcade (for everyone to see and mock at) and made some of my friends comment that I have this certain ‘plastic smile’. Well, that plastic smile is my smile. That’s reason I rarely smile at photos.

Lately, my group has been practicing for our upcoming finals in our art appreciation class: modern and folk dance performance. Well, everyone is not taking that finals seriously. Mostly, we’re all just doing it for kicks, heck, the fun (and embarrassing moments) of it.

Now I know why I chose to major in computer science and do writing as side project. I don’t have a build of a dancer. I do have the respect for that kind of art and I know how to, at least, appreciate the kinesthetic prowess of its performers. Dancing is not my cup of tea. After practice, I went home with a dizzying headache and an aching body.

Speaking of that practice, I met the *best friend of this certain classmate of mine. After our dance rehearsal, we went to a friend’s house and decided to have some sort of drinking session, which eventually turned into an open forum. For reasons I chose to not to disclose, I enjoyed that session. It’s probably, one of the best (seldom) drinking sessions I’ve had with my CS block mates.

Speaking of my classmate’s best friend, I was surprised to find out that she’s a lesbian. While the rest were practicing, we kind of talk about a lot of stuff: insecurities, sexuality and all that jazz. My conversation with her lasted for hours, having my friends out of place. In short, I ended up telling her that I am single for almost four years now and if I chose to have a relationship again, I prefer to have it with someone who’s either a lesbian or a gay guy and that I don’t see myself having a relationship with a heterosexual.

She said that she admired my honesty. I didn’t deny about anything. I’ve been uniform with my answers and it’s true that I have nothing to admit just yet. No one bothered to ask, and I just got the courage to be open about my real self just recently. To my surprise, she did too. I was amazed of her knowledge regarding this and how enlightened and (really) happy she has become.

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The next day...

We ended up comparing our retreat to our CS field trip and found the former boring and the latter better. I enjoyed our retreat. It kind of made me think a lot about myself and what direction I should take once I step out of school.

I lately learned to be open and true about myself and that experience made me feel like having some sort of conversation with God.